Super Clyde

Super Clyde

I feel so good it has been difficult to post but I had to mark a big event on the roll to heavy running the big one.. As an adult I have not participated in any running competition other than running for my life on a daily basis.. But my wife talked me into running the Torchlight 5k fun run.. Well fun and run have not always been two words that I use in the same competition.. Speaking of that if any of you know me I have serious problems when it comes to competing.. I don't know why or how to control it but when I am involved in any athletic competition (It was supposed to be fun) I cannot resist the temptation to win at any cost.. Put it this way when I was in college and my dad was in his 50's we would play "fun" one on one games in the summers to work out for football at 5:00 AM. Well put it this way I never let my dad get an uncontested layup "I would put an NBA playoff foul on him" . So all that being said we prepared IJ and ourselves made the trek to the registration area for the race.. It took IJ about 2 minutes of walking before he stated we are the biggest guys here (4500+people ). Our wives being kind said no.. But after IJ said please as we walk pass all the runners please point out anyone that is bigger than me.. Some 2 hours later after the race we found 3 total.. So IJ being the highest IQ person I know.. (I don't know that many people) Creates his own category for the race.. Super Clydes.. (There is a category for "large men" 200 lbs) After 2 years of running I can old dream of not being a Clydesdale.

As we waited and pretended to fit in with the beautiful people in the world.. (Not many of the people in the race where getting the incentive checks for GW if you know what I mean) We tried to blend into the surrounding but due to my baldness, Largness, Dumbness and general uneasiness in crowds we where singled out by people as the people to ask for directions and what time the race starts and where do we register questions. I think people feel comfortable talking to people that they feel are beneath them. But I almost lost it when the drunken bum singled me out as someone he could talk to (people feel comfortable talking to…).. Through the smell of rotting two buck chuck came from his toothless mouth I learned that he was in the 82nd airborne and was there for the fall of Saigon and that white people like him are brave and will through there body on a hand grenade to save everyone.. (I looked around for a hand grenade to jump on as that feel better than having this guy spew in my face.)

I was going to make it a fun run and with my wife and take leisurely jog through the city as people cheered waiting for the parade.. IJ made the smart move of saying this race is a personal journey and I will go it alone.. I stayed with our wives to score brownie points or whatever.. Both of them pleaded with me to get closer to the front of the race so that we would not have to weave in and out of all the slower runners.. No.. I knew better.. I thought it would feel better to pass them then to be passed.. Dumb.. The race started and it was horrible.. The pace was about 15 minute miles.. I tried to stay with the wives but it was driving me nuts with people stepping on me and me trying to avoid people and get by them.. I lost it.. This was not going to be a fun run this was going to be a race to see how many of these people I could pass.. (So dumb these people are running for fun and enjoying the night and I am a freight train) I am passing people by the hundreds I am zig zaging across the road.. I am in a blind rage to win nothing.. The city was beautiful that night but I could not see any of it.. I was angry at people that had started walking or getting sick after a mile.. I would see two friends chatting as the jogged along I would say on your left and barrel right through them.. I was an idiot.. There was a water station.. Do you really need a water station for a 3 mile run. Great another opportunity for me to pass people so that I could do what run faster and look like an idiot on this fun run.. I sprinted through until the finish line like it was chariots of fire only with drifit and baldness.. There where thousands of people that finished ahead of me and thousands behind me.. No one cares it is not a race.. I won nothing.. I waited for the wives who finished smiling and enjoying the night.. And IJ unofficially won the super clydes division as we noted later that he finished ahead of the three guys we saw after the race with 6 lb shadows.. IJ had a few people call out when he would pass them hey I am not going to let that guy beat me.. Beat him he kicked there ass..

It was really fun after the race to drink some beers and look at the river… I had a great time but I think I learned my lesson I am old and slow and when I start a race it is to finish who cares what the time is.. Enjoy it..
On a side note my body is slowly breaking down.. I have pulled a muscle in my inner thigh that is about 6 inch circle that is black and blue now.. I still ran 7 miles this morning so it can be that bad or maybe that is my goal to slowly beat this tired old body into the ground..

That's me HeavyD..

Stumps

What was that old army slogan we do more before 9 AM then most people do for the entire day.
Well this morning I had more anger before 6 Am than most people do for a month. On the weekends now I have to run a long run to build up endurance for the race.. Well I have been able to due this without much discomfort other than some foot overall soreness as I lay around for the rest of the day recovering. But this weekend was an exception, I had just got new running shoes since given my horse like weight I go through them like McHale goes through deodorant. I was all excited I know this sounds crazy but you have to make your brain think you like beating your body into submission for 2 hours on beautiful weekend morning when you could be laying in bed.. Before I put on my shoes I thought yeah since they are new I will put on these thick socks so that I won't get rub wear.. No I am an idiot I forgot that if you wear thick socks they will get wet and bunch up and create blisters.. Oh wow did it make blisters.. I have two silver dollar blisters on my arches. When I took off my new shoes they where filled with Puss.. I thought no big deal I just have to push through since the next day I had a 6 miler on my schedule.. I ran that day and it felt bad but normally after a long run nothing feels good so I thought I had made it.. I took my scheduled day off on Monday and ran a painful but sore 3 miles on Tuesday and then consulted with BOH about what I should do before I ran this morning.. He suggested body glide on the blister and wear better socks.. Basically he called me out that I was a giant wuss.. I had a busy evening so I was unable to get the body glide but I put in my thinnest socks and headed out this morning.. It was hot and every step felt worse than the first. I am hoping the dri-fit was able to wick away the pee.. I thought I was going to lose it but fortunately IJ had given me some songs he uses for motivation to finish his runs.. He has the old school navy running song from a drill sergeant that screams at you to motivate to you and this case it allowed me to beat my feet into a pussy mess. One more thing I misstepped right in front of this huge house where they where probably enjoying the early sunrise until this bald headed sweaty angry urine soaked man cried out like an 8 year old girl when he stepped on his own foot.. It was a pain like no other.. But I finished my puss soaked run and now will be spending the day at work drying my barefooted stumps at my cube.. Great to be sitting next to me.. I wish it was a few years ago when I couldn't see my feet..


Easy big Heavy
Shocking my last post was just flat our wrong.. I just get bent out of shape when armpit makes any move especially when it involves taking (slow,non athletic,chemistry,great attitude, basketball IQ guys) umm I mean white.. It makes good financial sense and if Love turns out to be quality starter in the NBA you get two quality players and you get rid of Marko Jaric which I would trade for a PBJ.. We will see how the plan to play a year without a point guard.. Wait a minute they have done that for 20 years.. OJ Mayo appears to be punk based on some of the videos I have seen.. Not sure you want to start a franchise with him as your front man.. But who Know what a 20 year old kid will turn out to be..


If you care to track my progress as I slowly wear of my feet you can see my daily updates here..

http://spreadsheets.google.com/pub?key=pq4SeGvUIuuEPW_5JBAFQFg


HEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVYYYYYYYYYYYYYYDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
ROLLLLLLLLLLLLLLINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

Have a great 4th..