Hint remeber the post on tis the season..
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Thursday, December 28, 2006
Fight Gravity
I just wanted to a quick post on this.. I changed the look and feel and I added pic to give you an idea of what gravity and double cheeseburgers have done to heavyd.. Ouch I used to wonder why my kids didn't look like me they look like the old me thank goodness.. Ohh I was still dumb and all but at least I didn't frighten people. Hey I ate lunch with BS and M5 today.. It was a good lunch it was nice to not want to be M5 for once.. It even looked BS actually was happy he wasn't single loaded and still had hair.. I think that is why B.S. likes to hang out with me he looks at my bald head I look at his and we both think we look better than each other so that works for me..
I just talked to the wonderthompsontwins today.. Activate shape of a hoover damn Activate shape of a Grizzly bear.. No that is dumb and no one is going to get it.. I do and it made me laugh so it is staying.. It looks like they are going to tackle the weight demon together this year.. I hope all goes well. I hear you fellas I am with you.. If you care this is the only thing I can seem to stick with. Eat something good for breakfast everyday no matter what I believe you need it to get your metabolism rolling ( I have old fashioned oat meal it fills you up for the whole day I don't skimp at all I just don't have any sugar on it either. . Track it make sure you do 10,000 step everyday.. I have been just getting up every hour or so and do a lap get some water or tea( I drink a ton of tea to get as much water as I can in a day.. It also is cheap and fills my caffeine urge.. I have one pop in the morning and1- 2 at night,,, that is a huge deal for me).. Then eat a normal lunch quality soups at the café here are good and cheap as well. ( I try and walk at least a mile at lunch everyday it is quick I don't get swass and it helps make my workouts at night simple since I have my steps in during the day. Then at night my wife does not make anything special for me or anything (It helps that our entire household does not really eat any processed food) Pretty simple you just don't eat anything white (we use whole wheat bread,pasta,rice,tortilla and whatever. Then the toughest item of all is no food after 7:00 or 7:30.. This is the hardest so far I have only struggled with this on the holidays and popcorn at the movies.. I can't remember where I saw this but it really works for me as well.. It reminds me of wrestling you need to have measuring stick on a daily basis I weigh myself everyday.. I know it is tough when I know it isn't going to be good that day or whatever but it reminds you of where you are and where you are going and it also give you some feedback when you succeed.. It is a key for me.. When I am putting on the pounds I never weigh myself.. So after the holidays I jumped on the scale and it reminded hey fatass you are going to have to cut back you just put on a couple that night.. Anyway that is my two cents.. Holler if you need anything the bigs need to stay together..
Ok..
I need to take the whole thing a little farther so I am going to start posting my miles ran in here each day.. They are for me and me alone.. I have a goal of being able to run 10 miles in the near future but I need to start somewhere.. By the way it is so much easier running now.. I just need to stick with it.. I ran 3 miles nonstop Tuesday… My legs are killing me but I did it.. Soon I am going to time it.. I have a question for B.S. is speed important to conditioning.. Here is my question should I try and run 3 miles in thirty minutes first or when should I try for 4 or 5 for that matter.. What will condition me better,faster?
Have a great new year..
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeevvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvDDDDDDDDDDDDD
I just talked to the wonderthompsontwins today.. Activate shape of a hoover damn Activate shape of a Grizzly bear.. No that is dumb and no one is going to get it.. I do and it made me laugh so it is staying.. It looks like they are going to tackle the weight demon together this year.. I hope all goes well. I hear you fellas I am with you.. If you care this is the only thing I can seem to stick with. Eat something good for breakfast everyday no matter what I believe you need it to get your metabolism rolling ( I have old fashioned oat meal it fills you up for the whole day I don't skimp at all I just don't have any sugar on it either. . Track it make sure you do 10,000 step everyday.. I have been just getting up every hour or so and do a lap get some water or tea( I drink a ton of tea to get as much water as I can in a day.. It also is cheap and fills my caffeine urge.. I have one pop in the morning and1- 2 at night,,, that is a huge deal for me).. Then eat a normal lunch quality soups at the café here are good and cheap as well. ( I try and walk at least a mile at lunch everyday it is quick I don't get swass and it helps make my workouts at night simple since I have my steps in during the day. Then at night my wife does not make anything special for me or anything (It helps that our entire household does not really eat any processed food) Pretty simple you just don't eat anything white (we use whole wheat bread,pasta,rice,tortilla and whatever. Then the toughest item of all is no food after 7:00 or 7:30.. This is the hardest so far I have only struggled with this on the holidays and popcorn at the movies.. I can't remember where I saw this but it really works for me as well.. It reminds me of wrestling you need to have measuring stick on a daily basis I weigh myself everyday.. I know it is tough when I know it isn't going to be good that day or whatever but it reminds you of where you are and where you are going and it also give you some feedback when you succeed.. It is a key for me.. When I am putting on the pounds I never weigh myself.. So after the holidays I jumped on the scale and it reminded hey fatass you are going to have to cut back you just put on a couple that night.. Anyway that is my two cents.. Holler if you need anything the bigs need to stay together..
Ok..
I need to take the whole thing a little farther so I am going to start posting my miles ran in here each day.. They are for me and me alone.. I have a goal of being able to run 10 miles in the near future but I need to start somewhere.. By the way it is so much easier running now.. I just need to stick with it.. I ran 3 miles nonstop Tuesday… My legs are killing me but I did it.. Soon I am going to time it.. I have a question for B.S. is speed important to conditioning.. Here is my question should I try and run 3 miles in thirty minutes first or when should I try for 4 or 5 for that matter.. What will condition me better,faster?
Have a great new year..
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeevvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
Tis the Season
What a week.. It is so frustrating being so dumb but at least I am consistent.. Where do I start should I discuss my trip to San Francisco.. Should I describe the abomination at Lambeau field.. How about the Christmas holiday.. How about the Wolves mailing it in this season. Oh maybe I should talk about all the free agents the Twins have signed.. Oh ok lets talk about how well the Gopher basketball team is playing in the barn. How about my battle with food.. Tis the season I will ramble on them all or maybe some whatever spills out..
Travel for me requires a ton of planning first I have to have some dvd's prepped for use during the flight then pack a toothbrush and deodorant no blow drier required..(too easy). I usually try and pick a movie that isn't too wussy but not too violent either since there might be kid nearby or whatever.. The nice thing about going to the city by the gay is really you can be a fatrosexual and nobody is the wiser.. Now I didn't want to go over board and watch a "life is beautiful " movie and everybody wonder why the bald freak is whimpering and sobbing during the flight.. (It usually happens later when I watch the ruling class in front of me cutting there steaks while I am asked to purchased peanuts for 5 dollars.) So I decide on the family stone which was ok for a fatrosexual.. I would give it to 2 baldies for an easy rental.. Just a little note to all of the heavy fliers out there do not pay the premium price to sit in the exit row it is a huge mistake.. They might as well sell ad space to those rows "ladies and gentlemen the exit rows today will be sponsored by Lane Bryant".. The seats smell like cheap perfume talcum powder, preparation H and a hint of summers breeze.. Ok anyway I pushed my way to the back of the plane where I was hoping to have a seat next to some little grandma or a hottie on her way back to home.. Nope not heavyD that never happens I am seated in a three seat section with a couple and there 2 year old.. I breathed a sigh and decided this would be good test of my patience.. On a good note the feedbag of weight that I have lost really makes a difference on the plane, my knees didn't push up against the back of the seat in front of me.. (I must have been carrying a wee bit of back fat) Anyway the kid was great the entire trip.. But Dad with the fire Tats on his arm decided that it was ok to go on a four hour plane ride with nothing to do except stare at the acne on the side of Heavy's head.. Eventually I pulled out the mags I brought along and said would you like to read this so he would stop looking at me.. (i thought about beating him into coma but I held off) Good move now he thinks I am hitting on him ... it doesn't help that he sees me watching the family stone.. As he tries to avoid looking at me the rest of the trip I catalog this in my wee brain.. Hmm act gay on the plane and you will have plenty of personal space.. (Not a bad trade off)
Let me sum up the gay area.. The area and the people are the same they look good from the outside but most of it is fake.. The weather is great the ocean is beautiful the city was amazing it is just so crowded and the driving is insane.. I spent 45 minutes going 4 miles on the 101 I couldn't take it.. Give me the people in the Midwest real people not real good looking but at least they are real.. I hope the cold weather keeps the Californians out..
The Vikes
Short and sweet and sour oops sorry it is getting close to lunch.. The vikes are doing all the right moves from a front office perspective signing the guys they want to long term deals and getting rid of the questionable players.. (other than Fatkinney man he is playing poorly). The vikes need to get some freaks to make them a good team.. They need a freak for a pass rusher that puts pressure on without blizting..They need a wide reciever that can 1 can get open and 2 catch the damn ball.. We will have to go a year or two with the necklace clad youngster before they will be a decent team but we need a 1 receiver.. The game at green bay just highlights the point that they hammered in this young guy to not throw picks but really when you look at the game the receivers where just not getting open.. Now a lot of that goes to the horrible play calling but this is the worst receiving core we have had in the last two decades.. Green Bay-- good luck with that team.. Sure I would have liked to win that game but the way the Vikes or Green Bay is playing getting in the playoffs is going to just be ugly.. My off-season prediction is that the Childress will be getting an offensive coordinator in here.. He will be a good head coach but he is just too predictable to be a play caller..
Ok. I will save more to post tomorrow..
Only put on two lbs over the holiday.. Not bad..
Fatrosexual out..
Travel for me requires a ton of planning first I have to have some dvd's prepped for use during the flight then pack a toothbrush and deodorant no blow drier required..(too easy). I usually try and pick a movie that isn't too wussy but not too violent either since there might be kid nearby or whatever.. The nice thing about going to the city by the gay is really you can be a fatrosexual and nobody is the wiser.. Now I didn't want to go over board and watch a "life is beautiful " movie and everybody wonder why the bald freak is whimpering and sobbing during the flight.. (It usually happens later when I watch the ruling class in front of me cutting there steaks while I am asked to purchased peanuts for 5 dollars.) So I decide on the family stone which was ok for a fatrosexual.. I would give it to 2 baldies for an easy rental.. Just a little note to all of the heavy fliers out there do not pay the premium price to sit in the exit row it is a huge mistake.. They might as well sell ad space to those rows "ladies and gentlemen the exit rows today will be sponsored by Lane Bryant".. The seats smell like cheap perfume talcum powder, preparation H and a hint of summers breeze.. Ok anyway I pushed my way to the back of the plane where I was hoping to have a seat next to some little grandma or a hottie on her way back to home.. Nope not heavyD that never happens I am seated in a three seat section with a couple and there 2 year old.. I breathed a sigh and decided this would be good test of my patience.. On a good note the feedbag of weight that I have lost really makes a difference on the plane, my knees didn't push up against the back of the seat in front of me.. (I must have been carrying a wee bit of back fat) Anyway the kid was great the entire trip.. But Dad with the fire Tats on his arm decided that it was ok to go on a four hour plane ride with nothing to do except stare at the acne on the side of Heavy's head.. Eventually I pulled out the mags I brought along and said would you like to read this so he would stop looking at me.. (i thought about beating him into coma but I held off) Good move now he thinks I am hitting on him ... it doesn't help that he sees me watching the family stone.. As he tries to avoid looking at me the rest of the trip I catalog this in my wee brain.. Hmm act gay on the plane and you will have plenty of personal space.. (Not a bad trade off)
Let me sum up the gay area.. The area and the people are the same they look good from the outside but most of it is fake.. The weather is great the ocean is beautiful the city was amazing it is just so crowded and the driving is insane.. I spent 45 minutes going 4 miles on the 101 I couldn't take it.. Give me the people in the Midwest real people not real good looking but at least they are real.. I hope the cold weather keeps the Californians out..
The Vikes
Short and sweet and sour oops sorry it is getting close to lunch.. The vikes are doing all the right moves from a front office perspective signing the guys they want to long term deals and getting rid of the questionable players.. (other than Fatkinney man he is playing poorly). The vikes need to get some freaks to make them a good team.. They need a freak for a pass rusher that puts pressure on without blizting..They need a wide reciever that can 1 can get open and 2 catch the damn ball.. We will have to go a year or two with the necklace clad youngster before they will be a decent team but we need a 1 receiver.. The game at green bay just highlights the point that they hammered in this young guy to not throw picks but really when you look at the game the receivers where just not getting open.. Now a lot of that goes to the horrible play calling but this is the worst receiving core we have had in the last two decades.. Green Bay-- good luck with that team.. Sure I would have liked to win that game but the way the Vikes or Green Bay is playing getting in the playoffs is going to just be ugly.. My off-season prediction is that the Childress will be getting an offensive coordinator in here.. He will be a good head coach but he is just too predictable to be a play caller..
Ok. I will save more to post tomorrow..
Only put on two lbs over the holiday.. Not bad..
Fatrosexual out..
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
Holiday Tradition
I thought I would change the whole feel of this blog and spin an old Christmas yarn..
I'm very scared for this world
I'm very scared for me
Eviscerate your memory
Here's a scene
You're in the back seat laying down
The windows wrap around
To sound of the travel and the engine
All you hear is time stand still in travel
And feel such peace and absolute
The stillness still that doesn't end
But slowly drifts into sleep
The stars are the greatest thing you've ever seen
And they're there for you
For you alone you are the everything
I think about this world a lot and I cry And I've seen the films and the eyes
But I'm in this kitchen
Everything is beautiful
And she is so beautiful
She is so young and old
I look at her and I see the beauty Of the light of music
The voices talking somewhere in the house
Late spring and you're drifting off to sleep
With your teeth in your mouth
You are here with me
You are here with me
You have been here and you are everything
Sometimes I feel like I can't even sing I'm very scared for this world
I'm very scared for me
Eviscerate your memory
Here's a sceneYou're in the back seat laying down
The windows wrap around
To sound of the travel and the engine
All you hear is time stand still in travel
And feel such peace and absolute
The stillness still that doesn't endBut slowly drifts into sleep
The greatest thing you've ever seen
And they're there for you
For you alone you are the everything
For you alone you are the everything
REM old school as solid as it gets.. I can never change this blog it would mean that I give this blog some thought.. No I will continue the same old crap.. I am really having a hard time blogging lately since I really have a hard time being angry about anything.. I have discovered the root of a lot of my anger comes when I am at my heaviest my whole body just aches.. I still have a ton of weight to lose but honestly when you are not in constant pain it helps out the mood a bit.. Anyway back to the same old same old..
We are having family over for the Christmas get together with my wife's side of the family.. Every year my wife asks me if we can host the party of 30 people or so.. I say no and she usually ignores me and has the even anyway.. The reason I do this is when we have people over for a large event like this it means that effectively you have killed Christmas for our house.. This is how the week before the event plays out it is just like clockwork. So my wife comes up with x number of presents that need to be purchased before the party.. (She buys 95% of them) She then comes up with a list of the 150 or so items that need to be completed around the house before it is presentable.. (She has to complete 90% of them) there is not a chance that 10% of these items can be accomplished but I play a long and ask what I can do other than stay out of her way.. 4-5 days from the storm the boys and I are being pummeled with requests from my wife to complete the 5 tasks that we have been assigned we of course are trying to find ways to avoid doing those tasks since it will mean that we will have to do more when they are finished.. Eventually my wife realizes that she will not be able to rip up the carpet and lay down wood floors before the guests arrive.. She notices that I have not completed my assigned tasks in fact I am actually enjoying the holiday season and playing the WII with the kids and that is more than she can take.. She blows up right on queue.. The kids are lucky enough to be able to go to bed early but I have to take my well deserved holiday verbal beating.. At this point it kind of part of the ritual so I am not sure if just out of tradition I am being more lazy than usual so that the beating will come quicker or if I just enjoy it once a year like oyster stew… So as I spackled and painted the kids bathroom upstairs that no one will see I go back down stairs and I apologize for being a piece of crap and she apologizes for getting so edgy and I give her a hug.. In the background I see the huge water stain in the kitchen ceiling from the shower above it has rendered the shower unusable for the last 6 months.. I don't tell my wife there is a pretty good chance the hot water heater is going to fail in the next few days. I know we will have 2-3 of this episodes before the party on Saturday but after while it sort of feels good like we at least have a holiday tradition.. Next year I am going to say NO to this party but we will do it anyway after all it is tradition..
Say No to AI
The original G-- The old school Gangster--- No not now not ever.. AI when he is on the court might be the best per lb player I have seen.. But this guy brought the NBA game to what it is today.. He is a gang banger… He is a thug.. He is uncoachable.. It is one thing to be a joke of basketball operation but operate with some class is something that should be doable.. It just doesn't make any sense we have one big that shoots from 20 feet and we are going to hemorrhage the whole organization to sign a guy who is going to spit in your face before the year is done.. The only way I would do this trade would be to flat cut him and get him out of the NBA and get Thud off of this team.. I would also make a poison pill clause that we would not take AI contract unless Kevin McHale is traded to the Sixers as well.. It would be more of a loaner we would give them McHale for 2 seasons.. I think with what he has learned with the wolves it would only take him 2 years to kill that franchise and leave them with no hope in sight for the next decade.. We could then take him back and have him work with our big guys.. I am going to rant here.. I hated Mcfail as a player but he was one of the best low post players ever to play… Why then as he never developed a low post player here.. He has not drafted or developed one.. I need to stop the anger is coming..
Vikes Rant Tommorow..
Why are we even discussing the playoffs..
239----OUT
I'm very scared for this world
I'm very scared for me
Eviscerate your memory
Here's a scene
You're in the back seat laying down
The windows wrap around
To sound of the travel and the engine
All you hear is time stand still in travel
And feel such peace and absolute
The stillness still that doesn't end
But slowly drifts into sleep
The stars are the greatest thing you've ever seen
And they're there for you
For you alone you are the everything
I think about this world a lot and I cry And I've seen the films and the eyes
But I'm in this kitchen
Everything is beautiful
And she is so beautiful
She is so young and old
I look at her and I see the beauty Of the light of music
The voices talking somewhere in the house
Late spring and you're drifting off to sleep
With your teeth in your mouth
You are here with me
You are here with me
You have been here and you are everything
Sometimes I feel like I can't even sing I'm very scared for this world
I'm very scared for me
Eviscerate your memory
Here's a sceneYou're in the back seat laying down
The windows wrap around
To sound of the travel and the engine
All you hear is time stand still in travel
And feel such peace and absolute
The stillness still that doesn't endBut slowly drifts into sleep
The greatest thing you've ever seen
And they're there for you
For you alone you are the everything
For you alone you are the everything
REM old school as solid as it gets.. I can never change this blog it would mean that I give this blog some thought.. No I will continue the same old crap.. I am really having a hard time blogging lately since I really have a hard time being angry about anything.. I have discovered the root of a lot of my anger comes when I am at my heaviest my whole body just aches.. I still have a ton of weight to lose but honestly when you are not in constant pain it helps out the mood a bit.. Anyway back to the same old same old..
We are having family over for the Christmas get together with my wife's side of the family.. Every year my wife asks me if we can host the party of 30 people or so.. I say no and she usually ignores me and has the even anyway.. The reason I do this is when we have people over for a large event like this it means that effectively you have killed Christmas for our house.. This is how the week before the event plays out it is just like clockwork. So my wife comes up with x number of presents that need to be purchased before the party.. (She buys 95% of them) She then comes up with a list of the 150 or so items that need to be completed around the house before it is presentable.. (She has to complete 90% of them) there is not a chance that 10% of these items can be accomplished but I play a long and ask what I can do other than stay out of her way.. 4-5 days from the storm the boys and I are being pummeled with requests from my wife to complete the 5 tasks that we have been assigned we of course are trying to find ways to avoid doing those tasks since it will mean that we will have to do more when they are finished.. Eventually my wife realizes that she will not be able to rip up the carpet and lay down wood floors before the guests arrive.. She notices that I have not completed my assigned tasks in fact I am actually enjoying the holiday season and playing the WII with the kids and that is more than she can take.. She blows up right on queue.. The kids are lucky enough to be able to go to bed early but I have to take my well deserved holiday verbal beating.. At this point it kind of part of the ritual so I am not sure if just out of tradition I am being more lazy than usual so that the beating will come quicker or if I just enjoy it once a year like oyster stew… So as I spackled and painted the kids bathroom upstairs that no one will see I go back down stairs and I apologize for being a piece of crap and she apologizes for getting so edgy and I give her a hug.. In the background I see the huge water stain in the kitchen ceiling from the shower above it has rendered the shower unusable for the last 6 months.. I don't tell my wife there is a pretty good chance the hot water heater is going to fail in the next few days. I know we will have 2-3 of this episodes before the party on Saturday but after while it sort of feels good like we at least have a holiday tradition.. Next year I am going to say NO to this party but we will do it anyway after all it is tradition..
Say No to AI
The original G-- The old school Gangster--- No not now not ever.. AI when he is on the court might be the best per lb player I have seen.. But this guy brought the NBA game to what it is today.. He is a gang banger… He is a thug.. He is uncoachable.. It is one thing to be a joke of basketball operation but operate with some class is something that should be doable.. It just doesn't make any sense we have one big that shoots from 20 feet and we are going to hemorrhage the whole organization to sign a guy who is going to spit in your face before the year is done.. The only way I would do this trade would be to flat cut him and get him out of the NBA and get Thud off of this team.. I would also make a poison pill clause that we would not take AI contract unless Kevin McHale is traded to the Sixers as well.. It would be more of a loaner we would give them McHale for 2 seasons.. I think with what he has learned with the wolves it would only take him 2 years to kill that franchise and leave them with no hope in sight for the next decade.. We could then take him back and have him work with our big guys.. I am going to rant here.. I hated Mcfail as a player but he was one of the best low post players ever to play… Why then as he never developed a low post player here.. He has not drafted or developed one.. I need to stop the anger is coming..
Vikes Rant Tommorow..
Why are we even discussing the playoffs..
239----OUT
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
PHAT CLEM HASKINS
Good to hear from you JLO.. I get the same jabs as you from various sources.. With the typical you carry your weight well( for fat ass) .. Snicker Snicker.. You have a nice shaped head.. Well what would I do if you said it was a horribly misshapen cranium you can't style bald any different it is what it is.. The only thing that bothers me when HOW does it is the source.. He is a marathon runner and he still looks like a beer drinking Bubba NASCAR Fan.. I don't know what he eats but he manages to be in great shape but looks like one of us.. Anyway no need to rip on HOW anymore it is much to easy.. I hate crowds (people for that matter) so I don't think going on a cruise is good for the big heavy.. I did some research on the banding with your svelte bro for a family member of mine and it really appears to be a safe technique for someone to control eating and still have full digestive function. As I have been struggling with weight loss over the last few months I truly understand a true addiction. It just sucks since the weight kept me from working out and so then I would get frustrated with the lack of weight loss so I would turn to a cheeseburger for comfort which in turn would make it even tougher to work out.. Hence the torn Hamstring the torn veal.. I am old and fat so I had to find something very simple for me so that I could feel like I was getting somewhere.. Hence the 10,000 step death march each day and the simple rule of note eating after 7:00.. All that being said I will always continue to struggle with my true love.. I rip on myself on this blog but all joking aside trying to eat healthy and control eating is the toughest thing I have ever had to do.. I try not to judge anyone for any technique they are trying if it works for them then do it.. I say this since I danced close to the 3 bill bear for sometime and I can tell you that my body actually hurt.. I am trying to not go on and on but man when you carry weight you can't just go start working out.. Your feet,ankles back everything just start failing under the pressure.. Again the vicious circle because when you try cutting back without being more active you don't burn anything and your body won't allow you to loose weight.. I know this is boring but hey it's me and JLO/HOW hit a nerve for me.. So anyway when I talk about my weight in here it is not to do anything more than hold my self accountable for my actions.. I would not recommend it but it is working so far..
Rockheads
Keeping the kids from being boneheads like there father is a difficult task but with my wife's help I hope they will be a little better rounded.. Not round and bald like me but more on the whole life gig.. So since my kids idolize IJ's kid this is a simple task for me.. (I will explain further) IJ family will call them the family VonTrap for this blog since IJ has been known to have his children sing to my cave children.. Well to make a fat story thin, the Vontrap daughter had a choir concert that she was singing in and my kids told us they would love to go where people made that funny sound come out of there mouth.. Well we all had a great time and from what I could tell from my underdeveloped brain and ear could discern the choir was great as well as the smiling Vontrap daughter.. This was yet another occasion where I didn't fit in.. So as the light danced of my protuberance the big heavy's brain was in overdrive examining each person and telling there life stories to me as I tried to distract my self I picked out Horace.. Horace was the only Male Bell player in the Bell band that played between the intermission between the two choirs.. First of all where does person go to play with other Bell players when he is 33 years old .. . Anyway as Horace was clutching the bell to his chest in the rhythm of the music I had to wonder what brought him to this point.. His mom Marge always wanted Horace to be well rounded so she didn't feel guilty by dressing him up in his brown cords and stripped shirt and keds shoes and sending him to his fourth religion class that week at church.. Well it turned out Horace was skipping out ever third day and buying candy at church to give to Brian in the hope that he would stop pulling the short hairs on his neck during choir practice.. Well Marge found out that Horace was skipping church so she signed him up for the bell band as well.. Well fast forward 20 years and 4 different color chords later Horace is still at the same church clutching the same bell he did now .. And Marge wonders why Horace is not showing any interest in girls yet.. IT IS PAINFUL TO BE ME.. AS WELL AS READ TO READ THAT.. IM SORRY for that.. (No I like to share the pain)
My son C says to me as we leave the church.. Dad how come you don't play any instruments Son your dad is a caveman don't be like me.. (By the way you don't have to wear chords to pioneer club at church)
Coaching
I have played a lot of sports poorly but at least I played a lot of them in high school.. The only sport that I still play on a regular basis (not since the veal incident) is hoops.. And to be real honest it is a close second to Football in sports that I watch on a regular basis. It is all sort of ironic that I get asked to coach my son's basketball team. I have never played it in an organized fashion at all I don't know any drills or games or anything other than see ball get ball.. (FT can attest to that) So my wife has been bugging me to volunteer my time to coach or whatever so I take this on to make here happy and I really love the game and I hope I can have some fun with it.. Well the fun got sucked out the first day.. The call me two days before the first clinic for the kids and they tell me we will be announcing the teams and the high school players will be taking the kids through a few drills.. Good I can learn something.. No not true.. The high school kid stands around for ten minutes and then leaves me with my team.. The league president says you have an hour and 40 minutes to work with your kids.. Oh by the way all of the parents will be sitting two feet from the court listening to every bit of crap I can come up with to kill 1:40 minutes.. Well short of them to doing the three-man bear wave I don't know what to do.. I could go on but I will tell you this It is hard to pretend you know anything about basketball.. It was the longest hour and half of my life.. Needless to say I am spending my free time coming up with drills and plays so that I can stay ahead of these kids.. I do like it but the kids keep wondering why I can't make a jump shot.. I tell them I am only doing that so that I can be like Ricky Davis so that I get closer to triple double.. No one gets it.. So fast forward to our first real practice I have a plan for every ten minutes of that practice and the kids have a great time learning the basics of basketball.. I had a great time but as I am leaving one of my good kids says hey coach that was fun but when are we learning some plays.. I wanted to tell him that I don't know any plays and I shouldn't be out here with you guys.. Oh that will be covered in our next practice….
SlingBox
I can bore you guys with this new device I have but if no one cares I will keep it out..
I will blog as the holiday season approaches so does the anger..
Rockheads
Keeping the kids from being boneheads like there father is a difficult task but with my wife's help I hope they will be a little better rounded.. Not round and bald like me but more on the whole life gig.. So since my kids idolize IJ's kid this is a simple task for me.. (I will explain further) IJ family will call them the family VonTrap for this blog since IJ has been known to have his children sing to my cave children.. Well to make a fat story thin, the Vontrap daughter had a choir concert that she was singing in and my kids told us they would love to go where people made that funny sound come out of there mouth.. Well we all had a great time and from what I could tell from my underdeveloped brain and ear could discern the choir was great as well as the smiling Vontrap daughter.. This was yet another occasion where I didn't fit in.. So as the light danced of my protuberance the big heavy's brain was in overdrive examining each person and telling there life stories to me as I tried to distract my self I picked out Horace.. Horace was the only Male Bell player in the Bell band that played between the intermission between the two choirs.. First of all where does person go to play with other Bell players when he is 33 years old .. . Anyway as Horace was clutching the bell to his chest in the rhythm of the music I had to wonder what brought him to this point.. His mom Marge always wanted Horace to be well rounded so she didn't feel guilty by dressing him up in his brown cords and stripped shirt and keds shoes and sending him to his fourth religion class that week at church.. Well it turned out Horace was skipping out ever third day and buying candy at church to give to Brian in the hope that he would stop pulling the short hairs on his neck during choir practice.. Well Marge found out that Horace was skipping church so she signed him up for the bell band as well.. Well fast forward 20 years and 4 different color chords later Horace is still at the same church clutching the same bell he did now .. And Marge wonders why Horace is not showing any interest in girls yet.. IT IS PAINFUL TO BE ME.. AS WELL AS READ TO READ THAT.. IM SORRY for that.. (No I like to share the pain)
My son C says to me as we leave the church.. Dad how come you don't play any instruments Son your dad is a caveman don't be like me.. (By the way you don't have to wear chords to pioneer club at church)
Coaching
I have played a lot of sports poorly but at least I played a lot of them in high school.. The only sport that I still play on a regular basis (not since the veal incident) is hoops.. And to be real honest it is a close second to Football in sports that I watch on a regular basis. It is all sort of ironic that I get asked to coach my son's basketball team. I have never played it in an organized fashion at all I don't know any drills or games or anything other than see ball get ball.. (FT can attest to that) So my wife has been bugging me to volunteer my time to coach or whatever so I take this on to make here happy and I really love the game and I hope I can have some fun with it.. Well the fun got sucked out the first day.. The call me two days before the first clinic for the kids and they tell me we will be announcing the teams and the high school players will be taking the kids through a few drills.. Good I can learn something.. No not true.. The high school kid stands around for ten minutes and then leaves me with my team.. The league president says you have an hour and 40 minutes to work with your kids.. Oh by the way all of the parents will be sitting two feet from the court listening to every bit of crap I can come up with to kill 1:40 minutes.. Well short of them to doing the three-man bear wave I don't know what to do.. I could go on but I will tell you this It is hard to pretend you know anything about basketball.. It was the longest hour and half of my life.. Needless to say I am spending my free time coming up with drills and plays so that I can stay ahead of these kids.. I do like it but the kids keep wondering why I can't make a jump shot.. I tell them I am only doing that so that I can be like Ricky Davis so that I get closer to triple double.. No one gets it.. So fast forward to our first real practice I have a plan for every ten minutes of that practice and the kids have a great time learning the basics of basketball.. I had a great time but as I am leaving one of my good kids says hey coach that was fun but when are we learning some plays.. I wanted to tell him that I don't know any plays and I shouldn't be out here with you guys.. Oh that will be covered in our next practice….
SlingBox
I can bore you guys with this new device I have but if no one cares I will keep it out..
I will blog as the holiday season approaches so does the anger..
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